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How to stay in good side of self


It’s getting close to Halloween and it feels me of deepened fall and excites me to see all the pumpkin colors and colorful mums in the city.

I am active taking sessions with my clients and getting some thoughts everyday so I am writing here.

I am getting some clients who are determined for weight loss and maintenance after the loss. I have my own experience of 50 pounds of weight loss so naturally I can talk and help a lot about it.

Speaking from my own experience, over-eating was chosen by me to distract myself from my own emotional issues. Because of the problem of over-eating and over-weight, my life itself was unfocused and thickened fog around me to even more unfocused on my life at the time.

In precise, I over-ate because I didn’t feel good to get some temporary relief from my bad mood. However of course, the over-eating gave me only temporary relief and other side effects too.

True issue then was the reasons why I was in bad mood. Was it stress that I got in everyday life? Was it about my marriage? Was it about boredom of my ordinary life?

Neither of them. The reasons why I was in bad mood was inside me. It was about my self image and in precise, it was about my self esteem if I truly loved myself or not.

How do we know if we love ourselves or not? I want you to think of someone who truly you love in this world.

Can you think of how you want them to live or what kind of life do you want them to have?

Would you want them to over-eat, over-work, or being in bad mood? Do you want them to feel the way that you are feeling?

Do you want them to do anything like you are doing to yourself? If not, you may not truly love yourself.

You would take care of someone well when you love the person. You wouldn’t push the person to the edge. You don’t want them to have a hard time first of all.

When you love someone, you would want them to have a best life, and want them to live comfortably everyday.

The way you take care of yourself with love or not would tell you if you truly love yourself or not. Giving yourself a rest and taking care of yourself is self love.

Over-eating for me was self sabotage. I pushed myself to the edge with putting too much food into me in the level that I couldn’t handle digestion on my own. It was an abuse to myself.

Not only I felt dull from over-eating but also my compromised look, blood sugar, blood pressure and all the circulations in my body were at risk because of my self abuse.

I say that our self-image and self values get fixed before we hit teenage. In child psychology, a child starts recognizing themselves as another individual separated from the mother at some point and reflect self image and identity from values of the primary care givers (normally parents).

Thus we have higher chance to have high self esteem when the parents love themselves. When the parents love themselves, it feels usual for the child to feel like loving themselves too.

When the parents are frustrated or dissatisfied with themselves, it would be usual for the child to feel frustrated and dissatisfied with their lives too.