I was talking about how self image affects on our life itself in yesterday’s column.
When you have a negative self image, you may believe that you would be somehow punished any minutes.
Of course, good things wouldn’t last either if you feel like you are not good enough.
When you have negative events in your life, you may feel like justified or simply deserve them, if you have a negative self image, of course.
In contrast, you may not enjoy positive events in your life with the same logics.
I was watching a movie yesterday that James Franco is in, the movie is “Adderall Diary”.
The plot was a writer who had a difficult father and childhood and he believed everything was bad in his childhood.
A lot of childhood trauma came out and he suffers from drug abuse though somehow he realized that his memory was falsely remembered.
Yes, our brains can have false memories.
We can’t fully count on our memories especially about impressions or feelings attached to them.
For example, we oftentimes different memories depending on persons who experienced the same events.
We believe that our own memory is right and others’ are wrong when the memories don’t match each other.
However we don’t know it for sure…, well, scientifically.
In the same way as I mentioned earlier, reception and impression we receive from events are largely influenced by our own thoughts in our subconscious already before the events.
For example, someone says that she was so afraid of her father when he hit her as a child. His face was like a monster. She may believe it long long time.
However oftentimes the father’s memory can differ. He was just trying to handle whatever the situation those two had in desperate way.
That happens to everyone, for example, impressions from TV or movies may differ depending on the time we re-watch them.
In precise, we can watch the same movie now and feel so different from what we thought in our childhood.
For example, in a movie, the main character was bullied and terrified and the bullies looked like completely evils.
If you had the same type of situation in your life, your impression should be highly influenced by your own feelings, the fear you already have in you.
It is truly prejudicial, can we say?
I have my own experience lately I had. At a scene of a movie, a woman who worked hard though the male boss didn’t take her seriously and chuckled on her work.
I truly felt that way a year ago when I watched the movie though a week ago, I found it felt me so different from the last time.
Literally, this time, the male boss actually looked a little impressed with her. It surprised me at the moment and I thought how could I feel the way that she was not taken seriously first time?
I have to say that it was about my own prejudice all right that I decided somehow that women are not taken seriously sometimes a year ago at the first time I watched the movie.
This time felt me different from it because my own perception was changed, I believe.
So many scenes and moments in different events of our lives everyday. Every single moment, we have chances to decide what the experience is about by our own prejudice.
It is like we have a picture or moving pictures and our prejudice will decide whatever we want to see.
This is not only happening to actual events.
For example, same scene or same visuals and different narrations are sometimes attached to them.
Very serious scene though it is going to be very funny when we attach a funny funny jokes as narrations.
We experience this kind everyday in social medias. We attach our creative narrations to actual events to make fun of them.
We are even more creative to add total fictional visuals to actual events to make fun of them too.
It is actually very effective politically too. It is in reality used for personal attack or it is called “character assassination”.
Against some politicians or celebrities and they can be put in difficult situation to continue their work and responsibility.
It is not really a joke any more and it is “character assassination”.
In other words, we can make anything jokes and laugh at them.
Do you have anything you want to make fun of and laugh at in your past? You’d better laugh at them sometimes, don’t we?
All the past events can change into anything that we want to believe, can’t they?
Because how we feel about past events are changeable.
Narratives are always free to be attached to any events and you can chose creative narrative to attach.
It may brighten up your own past, doesn’t it? We could try together.
Actually it is a little exaggeration and extreme way to put things here though all I want to say is that changing the past is quite possible for everyone.
Those elements to change the narrative are in inner-child and trauma work, I say and we can work together.
I will talk to you again tomorrow!
Have a wonderful day!