In yesterday’s column, I wrote that we are not wiser in our aging though we start avoiding risks and play conservative because of the mistakes we made in the past.
I believe that we tend to become conservative without so much challenging in our later part of life and getting wiser is a euphemism.
And we have scientific explanation for the tendency.
We remember negative experiences better than positive ones, our brain does. It is function that we have to avoid pain or ultimately death so this is defense mechanism.
Our mission as a creature is to maintain our own DNA and pass it onto the next generations. Some scientists say that our bodies are just rides for our own DNA.
For us, avoiding death is number 1 priority. And also avoid pains because they may lead us to death at the end. It is really a defense mechanism.
We remember bad things better than good things in our lives even when let me say that we have good and bad in equal amount.
Yes, because of it, in certain age, they say that a lot of bad things happened in their lives just because they remember bad things better
It is our nature and instinct. It is very unfortunate. I wish we could remember only good things going against our nature though then probably we would have a lot more risk of death.
Because we will be so optimistic and careless.
It is our nature to let us say that we had a lot of bad things in our lives. If you don’t say that after certain age, it is wonderful so I want to congratulate you!
According to the instinct, in aging, we would have negative energy more and more and it is science.
I can talk about something very personal as my dating experience.
I dated men from in their 20s to 70s since I have been single. The difference in-between the age ranges is the degree of their expectations for the dating experience.
In precise, younger guys seem to have higher expectations. They are relatively not experienced in relationships, I suppose so it means that they don’t have negative experiences in relationships.
The fact makes them have high expectations. For example, they expect to meet their future wife, or falling in love with a wonderful woman.
On the other hand, older guys don’t have so much expectations on relationships.
They may have divorced once or twice in their lives already so their expectations are low and they are actually afraid and avoid high expectation because it leads them to disappointment and disappointment hurts them.
Normally younger guys may not have financial resources much though they try and make investment from the first date.
Older guys take me to wonderful places though we can say that they just have resources at the end.
The impressions that I receive when I met them, I must say that younger people are much more positive than the other who seem to actually lower their expectation because they don’t want to be disappointed.
Well, super success people who we can get information in Google or Youtube, they are different. They keep their expectation high and they don’t waste of any time in waiting or anything.
The kind of positive attitude made them super successful that I can understand.
It is wonderful to see older guys who fall in love like a young man. However they tend to hide their excitements and try to act cool in the circumstances. Unfortunate…
My ex-husband was 13 years younger than me so he was very positive in the circumstance that I was much older than him, I suppose.
I say that older people are much more cautious and conservative. I am not saying it is bad or good but they are and the mind set divides often times old ones from the young ones.
I use the example of Romeo and Juliet who were 14 years old. They got madly in love but in the modern standard of ours, Romeo and Juliet can’t be over 60 years old, right?
Well, I want to fall in love blindly in any age of my life.
Of course, aging shouldn’t be negative. In Asia including Japan where I am from, elderly are respected.
However I can’t help noticing in the US, aging, getting sick or death are considered as taboo.
We should be positive, young and perky, maybe, here in the US, that is why.
In Japan, the standard was always age appropriateness. We followed the standard in the sense.
For example, after 30, such middle aged women shouldn’t wear bathing suits and go to beach or something like that.
I was so happy to know that anyone can enjoy bikini or beach in any age in the US. I fell in love with the attitude and decided to go for bikini when I get older.
However I feel like in the US, death, aging or illness are the sensitive topics so maybe because of the fact, plastic surgery and anti-aging chemical procedures are much more common in the US in our aging process.
I say that the older we get, the more obvious we show off how we live, positive or negative including our own mind set. Aging process would show our own personality, I say.
Not only being healthy or not in aging or not, but also we keep our grace in our appearance or not, it depends on how we handle our stress and also how little we have negative energy in us.
Yes, positive mind set would effect on our appearances, not only I made 60 pounds of weight loss on my own because of the encounter with hypnosis, but also the energy wise, you would have more shine and radiation when your energy is positive.
I will talk about it in tomorrow’s column.
Have a wonderful day!!