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Decide what means what in your life


I am writing this column in New York City and in the City, everything is closed rather than deli, supermarkets or something serving food even public services like courts.

In this impact, things changed, I say, what do you say? Regarding environments, water got better and air got better because factories are closed and people stay home. This impact makes a good effect on this earth for sure.

As we hear a lot about COVID 19, news never have even a pause and running everyday. Not only that, but also I am receiving a lot of email including sales to aim for this rare business chance.

I am receiving some suggestion to change some business strategy because we are stuck in the house.

Unfortunately almost all of the media information is negative and I wonder how people are surviving in this negativity.

As a matter of fact, I usually don’t follow news or media just because I don’t feel much positive when I watch or read.

Right now in this situation, I follow some news because of the security reasons. However I don’t check details of this situation at all.

Because I don’t follow the news, I found that hand sanitizers were sold out before I got to know it.

I heard that food was running out in the grocery stores so I rushed to the Trader Joe’s and found a line there already.

Sometimes strange timing happens and in the morning, I had something very important that I couldn’t miss so I asked my adult adopted children to go to the Trader Joe’s. I asked them to go there at 10am.

I had no idea how long my agenda would take but it finished quickly with a very good outcome and I was standing in front of Trader Joe’s at 10am sharp. It was strangely perfect timing in the sense.

Furthermore, I had a playdate style birthday party of my twins’ on the weekend too and it was the last weekend before the school closed.

We didn’t know how the situation would go but I could make it happen as I planned because in the week, children were still going to school so they meet in the playdate or not was not so much of the issue at the time.

I told those parents that it is completely optional for them to stay or not and ended up we had only children played together in the party.

The school was closed on the following Monday so it was the last minute and lucky enough for them to enjoy together.

When I feel lucky, I tell my children with extra enthusiasm. I put extra accents on anything positive and happy to make them stand out from the rest in our lives.

It is my way of thinking and I wrote a whole book about it. If you are interested, it is selling in Amazon. Rules for Success-How to live happily is my book. Click here!

Having introducing my book, I said in my book that we are the person who decides what happened in our lives and what they mean to us.

Of course, we can’t let other decide what happened to our lives or what they meant to us or what our lives are about, right?

Then I want to ask you what this impact of COVID 19 feels like to you. Positive or negative? It is all up to you what this experience means to you, right?

Whatever the media or the entire world says, it is all up to you to decide what or how any experience in your life means like.

Of course this is not just about COVID 19. You can decide what they are anything happens to you in your life.

I always bring out an example of my own divorce as I did it in my own book too. In any society, divorce is not positive. I was told to hold onto the idea and reverse the motion when I got separated years ago.

In fact, my own therapist went against my separation at the time. I was told that it would be hard to come across the nice guy like my husband at the time, now my ex-husband so I should stay in the marriage.

It was upsetting… of course to be said anything like, I will never come across a nice guy in the future so I said, “I wish you were much more positive about my life.” to my therapist.

I say that no one can decide that I will never get more amazing partner than my ex or even exes, of course including my therapist!

Well, it doesn’t even matter if there was no one who I could come across is better or not, I should decide what the fact means in my life.

Either having a partner or marrying someone is good or bad, I should decide like other things, how I live my life, what is so important in my life.

That is one of those reasons why we should choose a positive thinking therapist. We have to have positive input from them in order to stay positive in our lives. That is the whole purpose of going to therapy.

I said to my own therapist that I wished she was more positive about my life and she said that of course we don’t know what kind of business tycoon will fall in love with me in the future.

Yes, money… It is our own value that more wealthy, the better. However it is all up to me to decide to be with a wealthy man or not. Who is the best for me or who I fall in love with.

I am aware of existence of main stream values called “standards”. However it is all up to me how I live my life. Nobody can decide what my decisions and experiences mean or those are good or bad, positive or negative but only I can.

Personally I got to know a man who was chosen as one of the 100 most influential people in the world. Unfortunately it wasn’t a fate so we didn’t get serious though I surely had some kind of opportunity then.

He was surely one of the most wealthy people I got involved with in my life.

I learned a lot with knowing him. Of course, romance is all about connection and feelings. However the energy is very important in any type of relationships too.

I know a lot of people believe that beautiful women have more chance to be in good relationships. However I believe that the energy is still the most important.

By the way, the one of 100 most influential people, his drive was surely extra ordinary. I know that majority of men take time to think of how things will go or take time before even contacting women who they were interested.

However he was different. Either his expectation was very high or he didn’t feel like to fail. Or try it anyway without thinking about anything too much.

Ordinary people tend to take time because they don’t want to know the outcome. It means that they just don’t have high expectation on the outcome but he was different in the sense. Either he didn’t expect anything negative like failure in the future or he didn’t care about even failure.

I thought truly successful people are surely different from the others with have high expectation and amazing drive.

As I said, energy is very important in human interactions. Most of the people feel intimidated when they speak to people with extreme wealth or high social status.

A lot of people feel difficult to express themselves in front of people with power. However we can freely be expressive when we have strong sense of ourselves.

The strong sense of ourselves means about worthiness, what we deserve and simply how comfortable we are with ourselves, I plainly call it “confidence” and it is the key to be ourselves any time and at any occasions in our lives.

If we feel like, we are not worthy or there is no chance for us to be with a powerful person, then there isn’t or wouldn’t be a chance anyway.

My usual example to present here in this occasion is a prince on the white horse, of course. What would you do if you have a handsome prince came on a white horse kneel down on you for a marriage proposal?

I wonder how many women can say yes to the proposal right away.

If you feel “I should be lucky of course and I completely deserve him.”, it is wonderful. However you could feel like it is too good to be true or the prince is making a mistake on you or the prince will get tired of you quickly.

Success and happiness actually take a lot of self confidence. Of course, any romance is about connection so it is too bad if you didn’t feel destiny with the prince and have to say no to the prince though it happens too.

However the decision shouldn’t be on anything negative such as this relationship wouldn’t last. The fear that you will lose the prince, the luck and happiness one day in the future.

If you think that you wouldn’t even try because it wouldn’t work out anyway, you are likely to miss a lot of opportunities in your life.

Then do you think that your friends and family were on your side in the sense? Maybe not. Actually you start feeling others are negative when you are positive.

It is a hitting news that you are proposed by the prince on the white horse. I will be so excited for sure. However people around me may not to be happy for me.

Majority would say that the news is too good to be true. I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of them say so from my own experiences too.

Some people truly worry about me in upcoming break-up with the prince and try to avoid my sadness and failure. So they try to stop my decision to be with the prince.

Some people are just jealous of the luck so they would halt the relationship happens.

Of course, the prince is only an example. Maybe it is your dream to be a popular singer or to be a successful business mogul to change the world.

I can see what the world would say to you when you want to be a business mogul. They try to standardize you, let you avoid any risk in your life.

Then it is all up to you if you believe in your own dream or yourself when the world is against you.

I grew up told nothing to do with anything not to make money. It was totally waste for me to do anything doesn’t make money.

I know that worship of money is strong belief of ours in this world. However we know that money doesn’t make people happy either.

Talking about COVID19, do you think we worried about it too much so this current situation was attracted to us with the worry of ours? It is of course “laws of attraction”, right?

However and whatever the reason it is, we are here in this impact for sure. If we are here, there are only two choices, right? Those are enjoy or not. Of course we choose “enjoy”. What is the point out of it when we are already here to choose not to enjoy?

If we didn’t choose “enjoy”, this experience would be as hard as a frozen winter. That is why we don’t decide on “not to enjoy”.

Furthermore, this whole thing should be a learning experience of ours, right? What are we learning?

Have we taken it granted for walking without caution of virus in public in the past? If we have, we may have to learn otherwise.

I surely recognize fresh air of outside. I recognize how wonderful the sun and wind feel like too.

Personally I started doing some exercise at home such as sit ups, squats and others that I had never been interested in before.

And I am relieved some systems are on hold although I miss my office and work with people because my work is my life mission. However I truly enjoy this break too.

I hope that we can all be successful and make a big difference in this particular occasion. It is also up to us what this experience means and would bring what to us too.

And I know that the Universe will never give us a same assignment when we learn very well. Let us learn in this impact!

Have a wonderful day!

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